] Pondering: Beyond Frustration

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February 22, 2006

Beyond Frustration

Is there such a place? Yes, actually there are two other places where frustration can reside. The first place is where frustration gravitates towards when you are attempting to recover from the most recent hurt that had been inflicted upon you. The second place is where anger resides and grows into a sphere that is hyper-sensitive to just about anything coming in it's direction. One promotes calm the other promotes perpetual conflict. IMHO, we can dictate to both yet the second one tends to take center stage at least in the beginning it does.

I don't know about you, but when I am frustrated lashing out in some shape or form can take over or I end up internalizing it instead-eating me up inside. We then tend to catch ourselves and move past the redundancy of it all. If we are honest with ourselves we might even admit that we are not satisfied because we never made the other person pay for what they have done to us. Very frustrating indeed and the older I am the more I understand why it takes place. At a young age something terrible happened in my life whether or not that changed me permanently, personality wise, I can not measure it with any accuracy. However as an adult I am better able to measure the impact a frustrating event can take on my life and those around me. The issue is did it change me at my core, who I am, what I hold on to steadfastly. I must admit there maybe a temporary impact but eventually I snap out of it. Lately, it seems I have been snapping out of it faster and with less baggage, sadly that is a direct result of years of being exposed to such trials and tribulations.


One last confession, I may sit here today stating I am handling such things better yet I am sure this will continue to be tested as it often has and at the same time I hope I am wrong. The key has always been not to lose sight of the important things in life despite the frustration live throws our way, no matter how severe and deep it may have hurt us. Easier said that done when pain and loss is all that we feel, I know this too well and I pity the one that feeds off of it and continually inflicts this onto others.

My unsolicited advice is to love our family, our friends and ourselves better and we'll survive the worst that life has to offer, at the same time I hope and pray with all my heart and soul that we will all be spared such grief in the future.

N.

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