January 25, 2006

Life, Good News

Defining oneself takes a life time IMHO. As the years go by we take note of the things that have moved us and the things that no longer hold the same meaning to us. Whether it is maturing or simply removing the clutter from one's life the results are the same. We see things in a less filtered light.

What I can never get over is the fact that no matter how much I may have been exposed to I have not become desensitized. I still can not see certain things on the news because it tears into my soul. At one point I even stopped watching the news and read it online because I could decide what story to read based on the headline. Then I began to search for good news online until I realized I was wasting my time. The hours it took to peruse through website after website was simply a draining task.

Maybe good news doesn't sell or grab attention or it is merely lost in the many other things going on in this day an age. It was obvious that I was searching for something that I should have not been searching for online in the first place. Good things are happening in RL all the time but we just don't see it. Why can't we see it? Why are we missing it?

Internal searches arise when deep inside we still feel we are missing something. Now depending who you ask the answer will be a different one. Some people may say it is God, harmony, freedom or even love that maybe missing from our lives. The fact is, you are the only one that knows what is missing. The problem arises when we tell ourselves we can put off dealing with it until we have the time.

When we finally come to terms and feel we resolved this inner conflict many begin to criticize our choices. It is impossible to please everyone. I know that the best I can do for those around me is to be the best person I can be to and for myself first. With that comes being honest with oneself which is harder than it appears to be. It maybe only a matter of reprioritizing or it could be much deeper than that. Do we dare take that step? This journey is not meant for all since there are those who are happy where they are in life and with themselves. I for one do not plan to stop learning because life, whether I like it or not, has not finished with it's lessons. I just have to believe that some will be good lessons and therefore good news.


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